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(almost) funny

(almost) funny, Short Stories

What we saw in Bellu Cemetery was NOT a vampire and other Creative Date Ideas for Couples

“Love, let’s do something fun this weekend, something exciting!”

Normally, when Monica utters these words this is my cue to break out Venn diagrams showing “fun” in one circle and “exciting” in another non-overlapping circle to illustrate that these are mutually exclusive activities. And before she gets a chance to interject “logical” and “reasonable” arguments, I remind her that one of the costs of basking in the awesomeness that comes with being married to me is my need to devote adequate whining and pouting time to each request before addressing the next. If we start throwing out suggestions willy-nilly, chaos would undoubtedly ensue.

“Besides,” I continue, “Friday is Stir Fry night, Saturday we torture ourselves into a stupor on the treadmill, and Sunday is obviously Netflixing or football.”

“You know there are enough hours in the day to do more than one thing, right?” I’m sure she means to be rhetorical, but the look on her face tells me she kinda wants to make sure we’re on the same page.

“Yup, I get it. No need to brag about your multitasking mastery. But maybe you’re forgetting the dirty dishes, and laundry and…” (I sometimes draw a blank on the rest of my househusband chores, but I’m sure there are plenty of other things I’m supposed to do.)

I finish with the coup de gras. “And of course, we have to watch 40 hours of Netflix each week if we want to get our money’s worth.”

These points may not be as persuasive as you’d think, but it’s important that we keep trying. That’s how we grow.

However, this is prime vampire hunting season. My househusband chores can wait, and as much as it pains me to slack off on Netflixing, this is the year. I can feel it. We’re gonna find Dracula.*

Now, when Monica suggests we do something fun and exciting, I’m ready with date night suggestions…

“Wanna go check out a cemetery?”

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(almost) funny, Living Abroad, Travel

I found a Vampire (and he’s totally cool!)

Beautiful Romanian Destinations | Carpathian Mountains | Romanian villages

I hardly pouted at all when our search for vampires in Romanian cities came up empty. A skeptical observer might raise an eyebrow, but I assure you: foot stomping and annoying grunts is not pouting. It’s an incredibly effective way to shed the city grime. Besides, exploring Romania’s cities wasn’t a total loss. Timisoara and Cluj are beautiful places to visit. And after way too much immersion in Bucharest’s intoxicating night life, I learned that “clubbing” has the same impact on me as it does for baby seals.

The search wasn’t over yet. Once we left the big cities, I was sure we were going to get lucky.

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(almost) funny, Living Abroad, Travel

Searching for vampires in Romanian cities

Bucharest at night Romania

I’ll admit it. I’ve been playing for the past several months. Hiking through Massachusetts and Vermont, climbing a few of the highest peaks in Colorado, plenty of city stops in between.

Now, it’s time to get back to work.

Monica is quick to remind me that the job I signed up for is “Househusband,” and while I’m absolutely THRILLED to get another crack at those dirty dishes, we both know the real reason we’re living abroad in Romania…

I’m going to find a vampire.

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(almost) funny, Hiking

Celebrate International Yoga Day AND Hike Naked Day #multitasking

Hike Naked Day

June 21 marks the first day of summer. Words like scorching, sweating, sweltering, and sunburn are part of our daily conversations. It’s time to get away, preferably someplace quiet and cool. Maybe a short hike through the woods to a secluded spot. You’re not picky, but a nearby waterfall spilling into a refreshing pool would be nice.   


If you’re heading outdoors to get away from the craziness and chaos and heat, you might be in for a surprise. June 21 is International Yoga Day AND Hike Naked Day.

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(almost) funny, Blogging

7777 SEO Tips sure to Supercharge your Site

funny SEO Tips for blogging beginners

Sorry about that.

Way too much alliteration and enthusiasm for a title, but apparently, words and energy are big turn-ons for search engines. And most of us bloggers know that we’ve gotta show a little skin if we want to snag the biggies like Google and Ask Jeeves.

Before we go any farther, I’m not one of the 10,700,000 Search Engine Optimization (SEO) experts waiting to share the secret to making your blog the #1 hit on search engines. I don’t have a degree in coding, I don’t offer a limited-time-only webinar guaranteed to skyrocket your blog traffic into the stratosphere. I don’t even have pop-ups. I’m just a guy with a few theories about how Order is achieved in the Internet.  

Now that the disclaimer is out of the way, you’ll be happy to hear that I haven’t made up researched 7,777 tips designed to dazzle you with my brilliance. There will be no scrolling-related injuries on my watch. No Ma’am. This is a safe place.

However, I would like to share a few tested strategies that will get your latest and greatest in front of future fans. Some may even make blogging a fun experience again. (Remember when blogging was fun?)

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